Pervo is a simple roleplaying game, written by Tomas HV Mørkrid, who is a Norwegian games designer. This is the english version. It's all about violence!
Pervo caters for the DM's need to avenge himself on all and every player he ever has been forced to entertain. No player will ever be worth anything in this game, neither their characters. Players and characters are the scum of roleplaying games. In Pervo they will be driven away and exterminated!
When leading a game of Pervo you may call yourself a DM, meaning "Deux ex Machina" (God in the machine). You may also prefer to call yourself a GM, meaning "Godman". You may call yourself an ET, meaning "Egotistical" or "Emotional Topman" or "Elevated Terran" or whatever. You may call yourself anything. You may even choose to elevate your own name, making it into the most glorious title ever given to a man. You are the leader of the game, and none shall ever question your position. Your name is grace to the players!
Pervo is best played with a lot of players (to make them last a while). 10-20 is best. Cramp them around the table, each and every one. They must all have a small space at the edge of the table, where they can place their character-sheet (blank before the game starts) and rest their elbows (at least one of them).
When the game has commenced Pervo has three rules. These rules are absolute. The DM intereprets them at his will, and no player will ever stray from them, nor dispute them or the DMs rulings on them.
Start the game by stating that the characters have been at school for their entire life. They have learned how to cope in the world. Some of them have been good students, but most of them have been lousy. That's the reality, and Pervo is a very realistic world!
All the students have learned their name, though. The players shall write down their name on top of the character sheet now, in big letters. They must not try to use anything but capital letters. That is for advanced students. The character is called the same as the player. If the player happens to write another name than his own on the sheet, he will have to be corrected: Not to have learned your name at school is a disgrace! If a player happens to be named the same as the DM, he is considered very clever from the start of the game! That's a very realistic simulation of the real world: There is always someone born with the benefits! There's nothing fair about it!
Arnold is the great teacher that have told you this. You all love Arnold! Now he states that you are as ready as you ever will be, to enter the world. The great Arnold wish you good luck, and offers you a last advice:
Stick together! There is no telling what perils you will face in the real world! You must face them together!
The school gate open...
You are now entering the enticing world of Pervo! Outside the gate you are standing at a crossroads. The gate is clanging shut behind you. There is a road going straight ahead, climbing to the high mountains. The road to the right runs to the deep forest. The road to the left falls away through the hills towards the coast of the great ocean.
There is no reason to linger. School is over. This is the real world! Which way will you walk?
The first encounter is deadly. One character must die in the first encounter, whatever it is, and the player of this character must be driven from the gaming table with coarse language. Insult him! Players loosing their characters are worthless! Scum! Deadhead! Go away!
An encounter is of course anything. The characters enters the world, and it is a pretty complicated place, full of unknown peril. Lets say they meet up with a little kitty outside the school gates, unsteady on it's legs, very cat-like, soft-fured... and with very sharp theeth. Puppy-theeths are sharper than anything else, and serrated. Serrated! Those theeth will puncture your skin using no force at all, and make blood dribble...
The rest is pure imagination, and blood, and gore, and grotesqueries!
There is only one thing that helps your character perform in the world of Pervo, the same thing that makes it for you in the real world: Cleverness! If your character is clever he will make it happen. If he is dumb he will fail, of course.
The character must be given a cleverness of 1-20. The DM (Deux ex Machina) may decide this. The DM may also let the player propose a cleverness for his character, and he may be kind enough to leave it at that (at his whim). However; the DM may also decide that the player is too greedy, and portion his cleverness out to the other characters (as "gifts" from the nice player), or he may give him zero cleverness. A character with zero cleverness is dead! The player of a dead character must be driven from the gaming table with coarse language. Insult him! Players loosing their characters are worthless! Scum! Deadhead! Go away!
The cleverness is written in the middle of the character sheet, with big numbers. By doing this the player concludes his character generation. In the world of Pervo there is no depht to the character. As in the real world our characters are shallow! And Pervo is a really realistic world!
The cleverness of a character is tested every time the DM finds it necessary to test it, basicly when the character tries to perform some sort of task. It is tested with a D20. If the die is lower or equal to the cleverness rating, the character succeeds in doing his task. If it is higher, he fails! The DM describes the dire consequences whatever the die shows, or he spurs the player to describe them garishly. Consequences is best with knifeslashes and whiplashes, blood and pain, strong domination and humble submission. The DM should always be overly enthusiastic about the gore, to make the players understand that this is the true path, and start walking upon it.
Characters in tune with the cosmic forces of the gods, is of course more likely to raise in cleverness than any infidels. The DM may decide that the character is a true follower of the almighty Zader, or a slave to the serving principles of the humble Mazorg, or both. There is only salvation for the characters in true Zader-mazorgism! Only religious zeal will make their death a memorable sacrifice!
Every character in a game of Pervo shall die. They must all die in the most horrendous and bloody way possible. The player must be driven from the table when his characters has died. When all characters are dead, and only the DM is left by the table, the game is over. The DM may then howl about his great power, his godlikeness, and his sole rule over the game table! Hah-hah-hah!
Characters are expected to understand some of this game, at least enough of it to make the DM-task a bit easier. All players hate other players, with their attention-stealing characters of mediocre quality, so it is fairly easy to make the players go for eachothers throath. It's when the characters start picking on eachother, making gore gush out from spectacular wounds, and loving it... it's when this happens that the DM may lean back and watch his creation...
When the players left are into pure violence, their characters raving mad with bloodlust, and pain is their only salvation, that's the moment the DM will savour. Feed the sexual perversions and violent tendencies of the players, and let them loose on eachother. There is no evil in it, only a deep and cleansing satisfaction.
The DM may now congratulate himself with the fine vengeance he has inflicted on the players stupid enough to play Pervo. Players are really stupid! They think DMs must cater for their feeble needs, taking their feeble feelings and worthless thoughts into consideration when leading the game. That is so not true!
to the philosophy and ruling principles of Pervo
(only for DMs)
This is Pervo!
Let it loose!